Mouter (mouter) wrote,

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[Fic:] Just remember, I'm still here

Title: Just remember, I'm still here
Pairing: HayaRyu
Genre: angst, drama
Summary: Hayato and Ryu aren't high school students anymore and life it's not easy for them. They need to face with terrible reality. Nothing is on the right places.
Warnings: Poor grammary, spanking in this part, violence.

:  I want dedicate this fic to my pervy Gina-chan (moon_catcher  ) our Birthday Girl! And well it was you, who give me that idea for such a fic, so every complaints please send to her :P
A/N 2And I also want dedicate this fic to my lovely Nika-chan (nikattun ), who always makes me smile and who always is by my side. Your Pet loves you Master-chan!


“Ryu, are you still here?” quietly, soft and sweet voice caressed his ear. Voice, which became a little impatient. It wasn’t really first time, when he didn’t know what’s going on. He often dreaming during his meetings with clients, but these day he dreamt almost whole night, even now, when he should have been her.

“I’m sorry Mmomoko-san”  Ryu smiled back to women, and gently pattered her hair, which smell he enjoyed much. It was strawberry shampoo, which she used specially for him. She knew, that he loved that smell, and was trying giving him some pleasure from that. He smiled once again, and then backed to kissing her soft skin. Still he couldn’t used to having sex with stranger, but he also knew that he had no other choice, and he needed be great. For his own good.

She was his favorite client and she was visited him almost every night. Mostly of time, they were talking, well at least she was, because Ryu had never been talkative person, but he had another ability. He was a great listener. One of the best in their host-club and women have already knew that so he wasn’t alone ever for a one night. Always busy, sometimes even too busy, but he didn’t care. Women’s problems were a way better for him than his own problems.

“Ryu-chan…is there something wrong?” the same soft voice asked again and he sighed a little then he stopped caressing her skin. That was his second mistake and he knew that this night, he wouldn’t be able to have a sex with her.

“I’m sorry, Momoko-san” he whispered once again with a feeling of being helpless. “I can’t do this” he explained while licking his lips. “Today, I’m just too tired” he tried to find good excuse, but he knew that he fell. It was just one, huge lie. He still hadn’t used to having sex with strangers. He sometimes even couldn’t kissing someone, whose he hadn’t know. “Can we stopped here for tonight?” asked with a little smile and kissed her forehead. He had a hope, that she wouldn’t be mad at him.

Momoko nodded slowly, with a blank expression at her face. She dressed up and escaped from VIP room. She didn’t even bother to say “goodbye” so Ryu wasn’t really sure if she was mad at him, or not.

He sighed once again and lied in the big bed. Too big for single person. He closed his eyes. Everything in his perfect world crushed down. There was nothing perfect now. One huge ruin which he couldn’t tide up.

Hayato had gone to America and was happy there. He reached his dreams, had great job and was study to become a lawyer. Tcucchi had his own business and cute wife, who was in pregnant. Takeda studied English Literature and he had also great plans for his future and there was he, without nothing. The biggest looser on the whole world.

Once again sighed escaped from his mouth. He wasn’t a student anymore and he was the head of his family, since his dad lost company and now he had nothing. Ryu was forced to quit studies and worked in the host-club. One of the best one thought, but he hated it. He felt as a one, big slut, whom he practically was. After all he had money for keeping companion to his clients, and if they wanted having sex, he couldn’t really refused. His life was like a huge, not really funny joke.

“Odagiri!” suddenly the doors opened. His boss Tanaka came to the room and Ryu immediately sat on the bed, knowing that furious boos wasn’t easy to deal with. “What the hell was that?!” the men was now standing in front of him, grabbed him on his arms and forcing him to stand up. “Do you have any idea, how powerful is Momoko-san?!” Tanaka growled angrily and without waiting for boy answer, slapped him hard. “I thought you’re mature enough to know, where is your place” greeted his teeth and talking the boy with himself.

“Where are we going?” Ryu tried sounds calm. He hated his boss and he also hated being treated as a thing, but here he had nor rights. He wasn’t human in Tanaka’s eyes. He wasn’t human in clients eyes. He needed became a sex machine. His feelings doesn’t really count.

“You’re gonna apologized to her” answered coldly Ryu’s chief, then he pulled Ryu to the floor. Ryu fell down in front of his ex client. He could felt everybody’s eyes were watching him. Just great! He was on his knees, in front of woman in the room whole of people. Perfect!

“Please forgive us, Momoko-san” muttered Tanaka. His voice was shaking as a hell. He was really afraid of that woman, and Ryu felt happy because of that. Extremely happy, because in this whole not really good situation for him, he wasn’t alone. His boss was scared of the young woman. “That won’t happen again, right?” Ryu received a kick in his stomach, hard enough to remember him, where he was and what should have done.

“Yes, it won’t happen again. I’m so sorry Momoko-san. I didn’t mean to hurt you” he whispered without any feelings in his voice. He couldn’t show how angry he was. It could only ruin him.

Woman laugh was cold and sarcastic. She was devil rather than angel and now Ryu knew that she wasn’t easy to deal with. She kneeled down, right next to the boy and looked in his eyes. She caressed Ryu’s cheek and smiled sweetly to him.

“It’s not enough, kitty” Momoko smiled to him lightly. “The boy must be punished” ordered to the owner of the club. “You will fired him” added firmly and Ryu couldn’t really believed how lucky was he. One mistake could change his future. He could looked for another job, better one and probably not that well paid, but for now it was like a dream come true. But the happy moment didn’t last long.

“I won’t fire my the best worker” said his boss. “But I can punish him in a different way” he offered quickly, because he knew that Momoko wasn’t patient person. She needed have what she wanted, and every insult of her was punished.

“How can you guarantee me, that you will punish him?” cold voice of Momoko reminded Ryu, that it wouldn’t be easy punishment for him, so he quietly begged his boss to give up. But somewhere deep in his heart he thought that it would be better for him if he could stayed there and still worked at his current position. There was no other job for him.

“I will spank him” Tanaka answered slowly, still looking in woman’s eyes.

“What?!” Ryu looked at his boss angrily. “You can’t do this!” he growled, but he stopped, when he saw his boss killing sight.

“Shut up!” growled Tanaka and again kicked Ryu. The boy had bitten his lips and closed his eyes to not moan. “How do you think?” he asked Momoko with a smile. Woman nodded with a smile.

“Sounds great, but you will do that now, in front of everyone” she ordered, than she sat at sofa.

Ryu saw that his boss only nodded and the next what he felt was first spank on his butt. He bite his lips once again, cursing his boss in his mind. It was the worst thing which happened in his life. He was kneeled down the boss knees and spanked hard in front of everybody. Moreover, he didn’t know how long will be the punishment and he could only wishes his boss stopped.

Ryu was strong and he could stand a lot, but then he felt first tears, which escaped his eyes. They betrayed him, but he wasn’t a type of person who gave up easily, so he wiped them quickly, not want to give satisfaction to his executioner. And then the worst thing happened. He felt that he hadn’t his trousers and pants anymore. His eyes widely with shocked, when the next hit come to his already red butt. It was harder than previous. That fucking bastard was using hairbrush on his naked butt and it was fucking hurt. He started dance on boss lap to escape from the next spanks, but it won’t help.

“Stop it” he whispered. “Stop it you fucking idiot! It hurts!” he yelled again and stopped pretending. His allowed his tears fell down. “Stop it, please, stop it!” he muttered. “I’m sorry!” he apologized and he mean it. He felt sorry for himself, that he did that mistake and was in that position. He felt sorry that he couldn’t do nothing. He felt hopeless. He could do nothing and there was no rescue for him.

Ryu hoped that his boss would stop punish him, but it wouldn’t happen. Tanaka kept continued spanking his butts until they started bleeding, then he pushed Ryu on the floor and gave him a while to calm down.

The boy slowly caught the breathe and wiped his tears, then he stand up and dressed up, whining a little.  His ass hurt as a hell, and his pride wasn’t good too. He was like a injured animal and now he wasn’t a human even in his own eyes.

“Now be a good boy and beg her for forgiveness” ordered Tanaka and pushed boy on woman laps. Ryu whined once again and grimaced a little. His eyes was once again full of tears. He sobbed a little, then he looked in the Momoko’s eyes.

“I’m sorry” his voice was shaking just like his whole figure.

“Don’t do that again, Ryu-chan” she whispered to his ear while pattering his back. “Because next time it will be even harder. You can be sure of that. It’s your last warning, got it?” she smiled nicely and kissed his forehead, then she pull him in a tight embrace. “Now, where were we?” she asked with a voice, which hated objection.

Ryu nodded slowly, because he knew that there was no place for another mistake. He must obeyed, so he put on his face his best smile and followed her to the VIP room.

            Hayato closed his eyes and took a deep breath, then he smiled to his own thought. Home, sweet home. Yes, he was at his hometown again and he loved that feeling. At least he felt, that he was in the right place and moment. He grinned to himself, because he really loved being at home. He was happier than in the America, even if he was there just half an hour. He shook his head with disbelief, but the feeling didn’t fade away.

He just smiled to himself, when he realized that came back there was the best choice, which he could have done. Well it wasn’t really his choice. He hadn’t have another way to go. He was expelled from University, because of his absences. He couldn’t manage with learning. Becoming lawyer wasn’t really his dream. He pretend to that, because he couldn’t disappoint his family and friend. He also wanted show Ryu’s parents that he is young, responsible person, but he screw it up. And it was only his fault. He couldn’t be far away from home for a long time. He missed it too much.

But somewhere deep in his heart he knew, that not everything was all right. He was such a looser and he knew it though he didn’t want to say that loud. It would be to painful for him. He hated his studies and did everything to get expelled from them. Now he could reached his dreams.

Hayato from the very early beginning was dreaming about his own chocolate store and he even had been on the course of making chocolate. He wanted become the best one in that discipline. He also had finished the management course to reach his goal. Now he only needed the money. And that was the biggest problem, because he had no idea what he should have done to get the money.

His only hope was Kuma and his store. Kuma, who had already told him that Hayato could working in his place, when he would back. So Hayato had the place, where he could earned some money for living.

But now he had another plan, since it was his first day in the hometown from a year and a half, he wanted met his old friends in their favorite club to relax with a big mug of beer, so he sent the message with time and place of meeting in a one moment and then he thought he done mistake.

Hayato was afraid of their reaction of his drop out of collage. They would probably be not really happy from him. He would disappointed them, specially Ryu, who now was probably the best student on his collage and had the best marks. Speaking of his best friend, he realized that he hadn’t been spoken with him for a long time and he had no idea where he was now. Maybe even not in this city? Yeah, well he even wasn’t great friend after all. He was such a looser.


He cursed and punched the wall in front of him with anger. Some people looked at him with a fear in their eyes. He sighed a little, then smiled to the others. He was an adult now, and he shouldn’t have done such a things.  



But well he could played. Yes, that was the best solution. Hayato was known from his acting skills and he easily could made a fool of them. He nodded slowly to himself and then sighed again. Everyone should have believed him, everyone but Ryu. Yes, his best friend was a harder to mistake him for.

But Hayato was in a good mood, and he thought that they weren’t seeing each other for a long time till now, so maybe Ryu was able to believe him? It could be possible, right? He tried convince himself with that and took a taxi to the home.

Now he dreamt only about big bed and a little nap, before meeting them. He knew that now everything should have been in the right place. He was at home and nothing could goes wrong.


Ryu opened his eyes and looked at the watch. It was second o’clock afternoon, and he could barely moved. He was deadly tired and he thought about skipping work for a one night, but then he remembered things, which happened the night before and he quickly got up from bed and run to the toilet. He kneeled down and threw up everything what he had in his stomach.

Voices of throwing up was incredible unpleasant, but it helped Ryu with bracing up together. He must have done that until the night, because there was no places for another mistakes. He took a deep breath and let him out, then he got up and walked to washbasin.

The mirror, which hung above the washbasin was showing him deadly tired human without any energy to go on with living. Human who lost his hope. Mirror couldn’t be wrong. It was him, he couldn’t deny that.

“You look as a shit” Ryu muttered to himself, then he wash his face. Cold water was as a nice compress for his tired eyes and skin. He took another deep breath and tried to smile, but it was rather grimace than his smile.

Ryu laughed with himself deep inside him, because he didn’t really remembered when he truly been smiled. It was like an ages before. Certainly he was a shit now. Ryu sighed deeply and come back to his bedroom.

His phone was rang, so he looked on a screen and his eyes widen with a shock. The massage was from Hayato and he suggested meeting this evening. It was obvious that Hayato was in home now, and Ryu wasn’t sure if he should have been happy or not. It wasn’t the best massage, because it could means that his best friend drop out of the studies, or maybe it was only his imagination? Maybe he wanted that to be true? Yeah probably that was it, because in that case, he wouldn’t be the biggest looser on the whole world. He would have his companion in that path.

Small smile appeared on Ryu’s face, but the moment later this smile frozen. Incredible! How fast he became such an egoistic person? He shouldn’t have been wishes that path to his friend. He was incredible stupid person. Such an idiot! Hayato was his best friend for God sake!

“Ryu!” he cursed hearing voice of his mother. “Would you please come down?” her voice wasn’t sounds nice, so he just nodded before he realized that she wouldn’t be able to see that and came down. “Thank you” she smiled to him sadly.

“No problem” he muttered and licked his lips, when she shown him the place next to her on the sofa. He was sure that it wasn’t a good idea. His ass was still burning, so he just shook his head and waited for her words.

“Ryu” she sighed heavily and hidden her face in her hands. “Your dad left us” she whispered with a shaking voice. Her whole body was shaking and she started crying, but he wasn’t surprised. He even didn’t rise his eyebrows.

“That’s it?” he asked her mother with a cold tone.  “It’s not really big deal” he stayed calmly and shrugged his arms.

“What?! Are you insane?! It’s your father for God sake!” she attacked Ryu with a whole strength and was punching his chest with all his strength. “Stop being so cool! Stop with that coldness! He left us! He found another women and he did her a kid” she was crying even more, but Ryu hadn’t done nothing. He was just standing and listen to her mumbling. He allowed let things which she had in her minds out. “He left us… he left me” she fell on her knees. She wasn’t crying anymore, she wasn’t even angry anymore. “He doesn’t love me anymore” she whispered.

“He’s just a bastard” Ryu muttered, still being strong. He hadn’t really have a bond with his father. He hadn’t have her from the very early beginning, so he was rather glad that he finally left, giving Ryu and his mother free space for themselves. “He isn’t worth your tears” he muttered to his mother then he left the room. He couldn’t looking at her in those condition. It was the best option for now, because in the other case, he probably would told her something, which he could regretted in a moment later.

Ryu took his jacket and left the house. He needed fresh air to tide up his mind and to think about his future. His father left them, his mom was depressed and he still was working in that host-club.

“Just great” he muttered to himself and took deep breath, then he took out cigarettes of his pockets. He didn’t really remember, when he started smoking, but that was his way to relax for a little while.

Life wasn’t easy and he knew that very well. Life was rather as a big joke and was still laughing with him. He had enough of that live. It wasn’t fun anymore. It was too painful, even if he was happy that his dad left them, it still was painful that he had done that when they didn’t have any money for living. They were alone now, and nothing was okay.

Ryu put the cigarette out on his wrist and bite his lips. It hurts, but it also gave him a slight relief, so he took another cigarette and also put it on his wrist. It took him some moments to realize what he was really doing.

“Holly crap!” he hissed and threw the cigarette far away from him. “You’re really a shit Odagiri” he muttered to himself with a disgust.


That was Odagiri Ryu in person. The biggest looser on the world, who couldn’t manage with himself. So how could he be responsible for his mother? How? That was a good question.



That was the first chapter and I don't really know how many chapters that story will be having.
And I hope it's not that bad.
Tags: fic: just remember i still here, hayaryu, multichapter

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